There are three of them. They are not terribly old models considering the average life of the products. They don’t currently show any wear and tear, but they may if they stay in my house much longer. When I ordered them, the product description was something like, “Slugs and snails and puppy-dogs’ tails”, and “Sugar and spice and everything nice”. The products I received, however, appear to be flawed. In this moment I’d describe them a little more like “demons and monsters and scorpion tails” and “garlic powder and vinegar and everything saucy”, actually.
Or maybe delinquents?
Or maybe just children, but that is for a less tired and stressed mother to claim. A mother who isn’t cleaning Used Pull-up off the wall.
Do you have a clear picture of what a used pull-up is like? Allow me to describe it for you. It is soggy. And stale. Dark yellow-brown. Putrid. Squishy. Not folded neatly into contained packages like used diapers can be, but left open and exposed to air and touch.
Do you have a clear picture of what an exploded used pull-up looks like? Like the way it would look if those “children”, for instance, had gotten into a used pull-up fight right before school that had ended with one exploding on the wall? I hope for your sakes that you don’t. It is all of the above description, except also everywhere. Stuck in fractured juicy fibers all over the walls. The floor. The bed. The pillows your “child” [who probably deserves it] plans to sleep on that night. The mirror, which when wiped, streaks pee like the guts of a fleet of squashed bugs on the windshield as you try to get the pertinacious little pieces off. Let’s revisit the floor. It’s wet. Not drenched, or even moist really. Just wet in tiny little gushy sprinkles that burst in a cool, smelly sensation under your feet as you step on them. Your misfortune if the natural color of your carpet is very similar to the natural color of a used pull-up.
The mess is overwhelming. It can’t be left for now and dealt with later, no. The last thing you want is for the minuscule pieces to harden and become permanent texture to the wall. The smell is foul. Rancid. Old pee is a really terrible smell. Old pee on the pillows? In the carpet? Smeared across your reflection in the mirror? Anyone’s nightmare. The kids can do some of the clean-up, but do you know how great a 4 year old is at finding exploded shreds of pull-up? I’d give her a score of 50%, which is most definitely a failing grade. The 6 and 8 year olds can use a vacuum, they can use a rag. They get a 70%, but when a stale soggy peed-in pull-up is smashed all over the wall and the closet mirror and all over the things in the closet, 70% doesn’t cut it either. (And let’s not think for a moment that these percentages came from work done willingly and pleasantly).
So it’s nose [pinched closed] to the grindstone then for you, since they’re long gone. And bit by bit the room is cleaned, one smear of stale sticky urine encased in Fluff and Super Absorbent Polymer at a time.
I’ll spare you the pictures. You’re welcome.